I thought a little calendar might come in handy as you do your weekend summer movie planning. This is not every film being released this summer - just the big tentpoles (and a few others), because as much as you say you hate them, you know you're going to see them anyway:
May 4 - You already spent your money on Spider-Man 3. Nice work.
May 11 - 28 Weeks Later made about $10 million last weekend and will need help if there's going to be a 28 Months Later.
May 18 - Shrek the Third. Buzz is non-existent... even though the sequel was humongous.
May 25 - Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. It's the longest one yet, and even the writers don't understand what it's about.
June 1 - Knocked Up. Can't Wait.
June 8 - Huge counter-programming weekend. Surf's Up for the kids, Ocean's 13 for me, and Hostel II for um... them.
June 15 - Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer. It can't be worse than the last one, can it?
June 22 - Evan Almighty: The World's Most Expensive Comedy. I would laugh heartily if Knocked Up made more money than this, but they're aiming it at the kiddies, not rated R like the Judd Apatow film, so I'm not getting my hopes up. Also 1408 (John Cusack in a Stephen King thriller) and Captivity (the billboards the government doesn't want you to see!)
June 27 - Live Free or Die Hard (aka Die Hard 4.0) with a non-R rating. Can John McClane say "Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker" in a PG-13 film? I guess we'll find out.
June 29 - Ratatouille from Pixar will show pundits why you don't need to pump out a sequel to make a successful film. On another note, Michael Moore takes on the healthcare industry with Sicko.
July 4 - Transformers. This might be where Michael Bay trounces Bruce at the box office to get his revenge for their recent spat. License to Wed will probably only be watchable since "Jim" from The Office is starring.
July 13 - Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Why is no one talking about this film? Are they too distracted by the final book coming out the week after?
July 20 - I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry and Hairspray. I just know there's a homophobia joke in here somewhere...
July 27 - The Simpsons Movie. What are the weekly ratings on this show these days? Who is still watching? Wouldn't this have made sense about 8 years ago? Also, Lindsay Lohan's newest box office disappointment, I Know Who Killed Me.
August 3 - The Bourne Ultimatum. Yessss....
August 10 - Rush Hour 3 - The movie that society practically demanded to see. Stardust also appears here.
August 17 - The Invasion is the film the Wachowskis had to take over, and Superbad has Michael Cera from Arrested Development, so I'm there.
Jeff Wells says, "
"Is that... are you... are you watching Oprah?"
This is just the summer of threes, isn't it? Pirates 3, Shrek 3, Ocean's 13, Spider-Man 3, and now, 
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